Sorry for the lack of posts this week. My computer had some issues that were finally resolved late last night, but it’s been keeping me away from writing and posting photos. We’ll be back to normal and posting by Friday. Hope you all are having a good week!

Ko’Olina rests at the southwest end of Oahu and at the end of the H1 highway, far and away from the populous city of Honolulu. Several resorts and timeshares make up the majority of the buildings here, with more just around the way. Marriott has plans to build another building to build a fifth building, while Disney is busy putting up their own massive Hawaiian outpost here. To say that Ko’Olina will be a major vacation destination on Oahu is quite the understatement.

What does exist there now are several restaurants on the Marriott properties, both at the JW Marriott at the north most point, to the restaurants that are part of the Marriott Beach Club to the south.

Jen and I had the opportunity to eat at one of the restaurants at the Marriott Beach Club that sits outdoors, just a few feet from one of the four lagoons in the area, and a couple of hundred feet from the expansive, ever crashing waves of the Pacific.

I ordered the macadamia crusted marlin, which comes in some sort of glaze that could have been a crab juice reduction for all I know.  Wanna know what I about marlin?  It tastes like poo.  Well, not literally.  I blame the poo taste on the crab juice.  The marlin is apparently a very dry textured fish, with no tender flaking like I had hoped.  I did at least take comfort in that I’ve always wondered what marlin tastes like, so I can check it off my list of meats to meet.

Norm’s Meats to Meet

• Ostrich
• Marlin
• Extraterrestrial
• Alpaca
• Dodo
• Clown

The menu was light on vegetarian fare, so Jen didn’t have too many choices here.  There was either the pasta or…the crabgrass growing near the beach.  Seriously, there were pretty much zero available vegetarian options. She finally settled on a pasta dish, which looked decent, but fell a few steps short of being satisfying or appetizing.  For the price, I’d expect the kitchen to put some effort into this, but, like I said, even imported slop comes at a premium in Hawaii.  She left more than half of her dish on the plate, and I managed to pick at the limp vegetables, playing vulture cleanup crew as always.

Our friends had some equally uninspired dishes, one being a chicken salad and the other being another fish that left him just as unsatisfied with the meal.  We could have opted for dessert here, but thought better of it with the restaurant already batting a .000.

It would seem that Kolohe’s has little to offer visitors other than an absolutely phenomenal view, and drinks to enjoy it.  The service here is reasonable, but certainly not doting, and as I mentioned earlier, the prices are a bit severe for the quality.  The presentation is better on some dishes than others, which looking back at the photos I took here, I’d say is more actually about half.

It’s sad that a place as beautiful as the resorts of Ko’Olina suffer from some really bad tourist trap restaurants like this, but at least the JW  Marriott seems to have a better selection of places to eat, which we did for a number of our meals while in Oahu.  But I wouldn’t recommend this place for anything other than just drinks, and saving your dining experience for someplace else.

Kolohe’s gets two fins down.

See Kolohe’s on a map here.

Recommended For:

• Drinks
• People Watching
• Blandstravaganzas
• When Pringles and a Diet Coke Won’t Cut It For Dinner

Not Recommended For:

• Frugalistas
• Flavor Mavens
• Marriage Proposals
• Gastronomic Adventures

photo credit: developerimplode.com

Pienza Italian Market at the Gaylord National Harbor Hotel offers an enormous smörgåsbord of food for their Sunday Brunch, and definitely not geared towards the casual, light fare eater.  I’ve been here on numerous occasions, and have richly enjoyed every visit.  The restaurant is a giant biosphere-like enclosed atrium of the hotel, with a riverside view that looks out towards Old Town Alexandria, and intermittent planes passing through the sky en route to land at Reagan National Airport.  One of the best parts of having brunch here for me is catching the after church Sunday crowd, because the entertainment alone is worth the admission of the buffet.  Giant, ridiculous hats that could pass for proper headwear at the Kentucky Derby, and dresses to match.

And boy do I love me some hats.

But enough about the plentiful entertainment, how about some photos of the buffet?

Several large bread baskets offer up almost every kind of baked good you could want, such as croissants, muffins, rolls, and pastries.  My favorite here?  Go for the chocolate chip pastry, which I always tend to eat half a dozen of.

There’s a cold bar, with fresh fruit, vegetable salads, seafood salads, cocktail scrimp, and smoked salmon, which I raided on my first foray…

A hot bar with fish, roasted chicken, lasagna, bacon, snausages, scrambled egg, and cheese tortellini…

…All part of a very nutritious and “this is gonna make me Fatty McFat Fat” meal.

There’s also another station serving up pizzas, freshly made-to-order omelets, and carved roast beef for you to stuff your gullet with…

Or you can have at the waffle station that comes armed with all fixin’s, like whipped butter, whipped cream, strawberry sauce, syrup, and the like.  Note that the bacon here is a little on the weak side, so be prepared to have an extra helping of snausages.

Just make sure you save some room for dessert.

Besides the various types of cakes (and sometimes éclairs, on a good day), they also have cherry cobbler, peach cobbler, and both chocolate and vanilla ice cream on hand.  Sprinkles? Check. Crushed Oreo cookies? Check. Insulin syringes?  Better bring some in your jacket.

I love the fact that all the plates are so vibrant and rich in color.  Each table has a cup filled with forks, knives, and spoons, which lends a casual and unique touch.  The service here is pretty good, with dirty plates being cleared every time I went to get another round of food.

At around $40 with tip, it’s hard to say whether this is the right place for the average buffet diner.  It’s definitely an experience, and the atmosphere here is top notch, but the cost is a detriment from making this as regular of an occurrence as I’d like it to be.  Parking in the adjacent garage can be validated by the hostess for up to 3 hours, which gives you enough time to walk around the surrounding National Harbor area to check out the various art shows and boats down at the dock.

See Pienza Italian Market on a map here.

Recommended For:

• Competitive Eater Training Sessions
• Brunch Buffet Buffs
• Sunday Celebrations
• Out of town family visits

Not Recommended For:

• Zone Dieters
• Paleo heads
• Nitpicky Noshers

I had the perfect opportunity to try this recipe out while Jen and I were out vacationing in Hawaii. Reading over the ingredients list, you’d question whether or not this really will taste good, as I did while I was prepping the salad. The result? Delicious. I neglected to pick up red wine vinegar as Paula Deen calls for in her original recipe, but balsamic vinegar works just as well here. My one suggestion, is that if you’re making this while you’re out in Hawaii, is to make sure and not buy the 14 lb watermelon at $1.49 a pound.

Whoops.

So…how about that Kama’aina discount?

Don’t judge this one by how it looks, because it’s a great way to fight off a long, arduous day of relaxing in the Pacific sun.

Adapted from Paula Deen’s recipe here.

Jen and I stopped by downtown San Francisco for lunch on a layover, and we made a beeline straight for one of her favorite Mexican places in the city – Colibri Mexican Bistro.  The restaurant gives off a sleep post siesta atmosphere during the day, and the perfect setting for a rambunctious and lively watering hole at night.

The guacamole here is good. Damn good.  Like trade your sister who made you walk home every day after practice because she was too busy making out with some jock during high school good.  The menu says it’s made fresh at your table, which I never witnessed, but I’m always one to believe that guacamole is one of those rare foods that’ll instantly tell you whether or not it’s been made fresh or from the day before.  Fresh guacamole just has a je ne sais quoi that guacamole savants like Jen can tell whether it’s the not so fresh…stuff.

Anyways.  Behold. The sacrificial stone mortar of guac.

The guacamole arrives with hand searingly-hot homemade corn tortillas and a trio of salsa, which started one of the most beautiful guacamole soft taco binges I’ve ever been involved in.  Well, except for the soft taco binge of ’86 when I had that chance encounter with those midget twins from Wisconsin while high on unicorn meat and absinthe, but that’s a story for another day.

We also split an order of the Tamalitos Colibri, a small plate of corn dough stuffed with Oaxacan cheese and drowned in tomato sauce, queso fresco, and white corn.  The end result was something that tasted like it came straight out of Chef Boyardee’s private recipe book.  Not a bad dish per se, but with a flavor that so strongly resembled something you ate after class in grade school (or college, for some of us), it wasn’t a big hit with either of us.

For our entrees, Jen ordered the Huevos Rancheros.  Two eggs cooked over easy on a blue corn tortilla, served with salsa molcajeteada and the smoothest refried beans I’ve ever tasted.  I mean Barry White smooth.

I opted for the Caritas omelet, a generous portion of juicy pulled pork, wrapped in eggs and then dressed with sala ranchera, served with more of those Barry White refried black beans, Oaxacan cheese, and potatoes.  BAM.  Awesomeness.

And just to make sure we had enough food (in fact, the waiter wanted to make sure just how much food we were getting into here), I also put in an order for the Torrejas Colibri – a homemade cinnamon coated Mexican pastry that’s somewhere between french toast and bread pudding without being either, served fresh berries, mango, and left to drown in a pool of honey agave sizzurp.  Er, syrup.

Brunch here was exactly what I needed on our layover.  Lots of homemade foods, worth the venture outside of the airport that serves up little more than TSA approved reheated meals of flavored gruel, in your choice of consistency.  Prices here are more than reasonable

Colibri’s my new favorite go to spot for Mexican in San Francisco.  Now I just need another opportunity to visit.

See Colibri on a map here.

Recommended For:

• Guac Jocks
• Vegetarians
• Mexican Delights (that’s not some weird nickname for a sex position)
• First Dates
• Second Dates
• Fresh, Homemade Tasting Food

Not Recommended For:

• 21 Consecutive Tequila Shots
• Singing “My Little Buttercup” to your fellow patrons
• Zone Dieters
• Deliciousness Defiants

On our last visit to the restaurant, Jen and I had a less than positive experience at PS7′s. I won’t rehash all the sordid details, but you can read about our Restaurant Week (RW) visit here.

Fast forward a couple months to the present date, and we still were holding on to a coupon that we weren’t able to use on our previous visit.  Steeling ourselves for a return, we made our reservations and headed back over for dinner.

The first difference was immediately noticeable:  the restaurant was tamer, quieter, and filled with a vastly different crowd.  I’m not sure if I could pin down a specific group of people, but there was a good deal more diversity in age, group sizes, and species types of people in general.  A much easier going crowd, celebrating anniversaries, visits from parents, and random diners like us, less of a concentration of budget diners looking to get sloshed at the bar afterwards.

Free from the confines of a restricted “dining on rails” RW menu, Jen and I decided to split a Nutty Goat Flatbread, coated in walnut butter, goat cheese, arugula, and shallots.

I also threw in an order of the Angel Wings – a quartet of sausage stuffed boneless chicken wings, served with a generous serving of a peach gastrique.

What we were treated to was…vastly better than our last set of appetizers there.  The flatbread, about the size of an 8-inch pizza, was buttery without being too greasy, loaded with a rich goat cheese flavor, and given just the right amount of wilted arugula and shallots to pair it off.  Like a goat cheese salad on bread.  My angel wings were the equivalent of a gourmet order of Chickum McNuggets served with sweet’n'sour sauce.  I tore through the nuggets in a matter of seconds, without even bothering to offer Jen a single one.

In retrospect, I’m 99.9% sure she really didn’t mind.

Our entrees, arrived in short fashion.  Jen ordered the Cannelloni, a cast-iron skillet filled with celery root, sweet potato, and mushroom ‘sausage’, straight from Hell’s Kitchen.  Well, with as hot as this dish was, it might as well have been delivered from the underworld.  Jen burnt her tongue on her first taste, and took a few spoonfuls onto her bread plate just to have it cool down from the cast iron skillet.  I guess you can’t really complain about food being too quick from the kitchen, right?

I let Jen pick out my plate, and she went with the Stuffed Pork Loin – a giant slab of pork, pounded and rolled with leeks, spinach, bacon, and coated with parmesan, then served with a sherry au jus.

My girl knows me so damn well.  Or maybe she was just living vicariously through me.  One of these days, she just won’t be able to resist the call of the bacon.  Either way, I really enjoyed this dish.  The pork was succulent, and the leek/spinach/bacon stuffing just seemed like a natural pairing for the pork loin.  The only way it could have been better would have been having this dish served in a bacon gravy, with a side of bacon lollipops.

Sweet merciful Jebus I love bacon.

I’m sure that Restaurant Week brings in the volume and the dollars, but the set menu does this establishment no justice whatsoever.  I almost wish that we hadn’t gone here for Restaurant Week in the first place.  While PS7′s still might not be at the top of my favorite places in the city, it’s certainly much better than I had originally thought.

The best part?  The kitchen sends a dessert out to every table, compliments of the chef.  Two freshly made soft truffles.

Still looks like a skidmark to me. A damn tasty one, at that.

I saw this recipe and put it on my list of things to try. The one ingredient I didn’t have on hand were coconut flakes, which a most typical supermarkets really don’t carry. Or keep it stocked in the most ridiculous places instead of the cooking and baking section, where, at least in my warped mind, I think they would be kept.

So finally, I got to giving these a go! They’re not especially sweet, even with my addition of raisins. I think some chopped dates would really spice these up, or possibly even using some maple flakes! The one thing I do like about these is that they’re providing me with an extremely portable way for me to bring along my fats on trips without have to just rely on those packet grenades of almond butter all the time.  I’ll get to working on a few variations to try, but here’s something to get you started.

Adapted from Girl Gone Primal’s Almond and Coconut Biscuits:

Ingredients:

• 1 1/2 cups almond flour
• 1/2 cup of shredded coconut
• 1/4 cup coconut oil
• 1/4 cup of raisins
• 1 egg, beaten
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon
• 1 teaspoon nutmeg
• 1 teaspoon bourbon vanilla (make sure it’s real vanilla extract)
• 1 tablespoon honey

Hi folks! I’m taking a little breather from blogging this week, but Jen and I will be back next week with more recipes, reviews, and stories of omnomnomnomnom. Stay out of trouble, and we’ll see you then!

I’ve been looking for a good recipe to introduce you to one of my best friends as of late, and this time, it’s not one that’ll get me put away for indecent exposure.  No, I’m talking about the crockpot.  How did I go so long without having one of these things?  I’ve likely had more days with this thing on and cooking away in the past month than not.  These things aren’t terribly expensive, either;  you can pick up one from any number of places for under $50.

Here’s a recipe that I’ve made a slight change upon from the original.

Adapted from Mark’s Daily Apple’s Garlic Pulled Pork:

Ingredients:

• 1 pork shoulder cut (butt or picnic), approximately 3-4 pounds
  
• 2 tablespoons habanero sea salt
• 1/2 teaspoon cumin
• 1 teaspoon of freshly ground black pepper
• 6 fresh garlic cloves, diced
• The juice of two limes
• 1/2 large sweet onion, chopped
• 1 bay leaf
• 5 dried chipotle peppers

Directions:

1. Combine the sea salt, black pepper, cumin, and diced garlic in a bowl.  Set aside.
2. Add the chopped onions, chipotle peppers, and bay leaf to the crock pot.
3. Place the pork shoulder on top of the onions in the crock pot, and juice one lime as evenly as you can over the pork.  Turn the pork over in the crockpot, and juice the second lime over the other side of the pork.  Season the pork with half of the salt/pepper/cumin/garlic mixture, rubbing it into the meat as best as you can.  Flip the pork shoulder over one more time in the crock pot, and use the remaining mixture to rub into the meat.
   
4. Cover the crock pot, and let cook for 6-8 hours.

I swear to you, it does not get any easier than this.  You’ll have a delicious pulled pork waiting for you when you get home from work if you can set this going in the morning.  Don’t worry about overcooking this, because, well, you can’t, really.  Just trust me.

The most tedious part of this was removing the fat because I don’t particularly care for it, but you can feel free to eat that, too.  Works wonders if you’ve refrigerated this and want to fry the pulled pork with some vegetables later.  There’s enough pork here for a few days, and that should help get you get a solid source of protein for any meal of the day!

Going Paleo doesn’t have to be expensive. In my last trip to CostCo, I managed to stuff my fridge with all sorts of paleo goodness that’ll keep me set for a few weeks. I took a few photos and hopefully, for those of you who are looking to try a paleo diet, these might help you get started. Granted, you’ll need to pick up a membership to CostCo, or one of the similar competitors like BJ’s or Sam’s Club, but in my opinion, the money’s well worth it.

Almond Butter – $5.79 per bottle

The giant tub on the right dwarfs even my previous value champion, Trader Joe’s.  At 26 oz, it is 10 oz more than the jar size I get at TJ’s, and I’m pretty sure it’s about 14 oz. larger than the jars you can pick up at Whole Foods.  The price is comparable to TJ’s, and I’m fairly certain cheaper than much smaller bottles at Whole Foods of the same brand.

They keep it simple here, with nothing added beyond dry roasted almonds. No sugars, no extra oils, just almonds.  I picked up three bottles, which should last me about a month or so.

Guacamole – $7.99 for 3 tubs

If almonds aren’t your thing, or you have a nut allergy of any sorts, this might be just the fats you’re looking for.  These tubs of guacamole are amazing.  They come smashed and perfectly sealed, with about 2 cups worth of guacamole in each tub.  You can put the unopened tubs in the freezer for later use if you don’t think you’re going to go through it all in one go.  I added a bit of lime juice and smoked paprika, and almost polished an entire tub in one sitting.

Grilled Chicken Breast Strips – $9.99 for two 2lb bags (4 lbs total)

If you’re short on time for cooking, these work well in a pinch.  I usually throw one bag in the freezer, and steadily plow through these chicken strips through the week with some asparagus for lunch.  All you need to do is reheat these, and you’re good to go!  Not free range or vegetarian fed, but they’re a better choice than something that’s drenched in a sugary sauce instead.

Organic Cage -Free Vegetarian Fed Eggs – $6.99 for 2 dozen

Considering that a dozen of cage-free vegetarian fed eggs at my local ethnic grocery store still run about $3 – $4, I thought these were a pretty good value.  I’ll generally take half and hard boil them, and use the other half for cooking.  Super high quality eggs, and a very good price.

D’anjou Pears – $4.79 for 6 lbs

I’ve recently rediscovered pears, and d’anjour pears are some of my favorites.  I’ll keep most of the chillin’ in the fridge, taking out two to three at a time to put in the fruit bowl.  They’re in season right now, and a nice post workout carbohydrate source.

Plums – $5.99 for 4 lbs

Another favorite post workout carbohydrate, or even something to start the day, I do the same thing with these that I do with the pears.  I keep the vast majority of this crate in the fridge, and put a few to ripen in the fruit bowl, replenishing them as I go through them during the week.

Mini Sweet Peppers – $4.49 for 2 lbs

These are my favorite type of vegetable carbohydrate.  Slice off the top, remove the seeds, and eat them raw.  They’re just sweet enough that you could fool yourself you’re eating some semi-sweet apples.

A few more items not pictured:

• Baby Spinach – $4.99 for 2.5 lbs – Another easy to use and versatile vegetable.  Use it to boost the protein in your salads, steam it with some chicken broth and side it with some meat, or any other number of ways you’d like to eat it.
• Asparagus Spears – $3.99 for 2.25 lbs – I take about 10-12 spears, snap off the ends, and cut into thirds.  Then I’ll take those and pair it with the grilled chicken above, and I’ve got a lunch made in less than five minutes.
• Sweet Potatoes – $8.99 for 10 lbs – Another great post workout carbohydrate, really does wonders to restore your glycogen levels after a heavy metcon that leaves you gasping for air on the floor.
• Smoked Andouille Chicken Sausages – $13.99 for 3 lbs – I love these sausages because, again, they’re quick to slice and prepare for lunch, and all you have to do is heat them up.  They’re not great in terms of sodium levels, but not horrible if you’re eating them every day.  No sugar in the ingredients list, so these are good by me.

All in all, I gathered quite a stash of food.  If you’ve got more than one mouth to feed, then this food will go fast, but if not, it’ll last you a few weeks with maybe an occasional trip to the store to pick up some other meats or veggies to supplement your hoard.