La Frégate

La Frégate sits right on the southside of the Seine River in Paris, at one end of the Pont Royal bridge and just a few minutes away from le Jardin de Tuileries and the Louvre, residence of Mona Lisa. The restaurant seems to fit in with your assortment of standard French cafes. There is a row of seats and tables just outside the restaurant where you can enjoy a coffee, espresso, wine, or leisurely lunch watching the life Parisiennes as they go by. You might be as fortunate as Jen and I were to witness a child jumping out the rear seat with his mother, darting to the wall that overlooks into the Seine and get to a narrowly averted pant wetting during your leisurely lunch.

It’s at that moment that we were keenly reminded that there are almost no public bathrooms in Paris. As Americans, we take many things in our daily lives for granted. The right to own guns. To have a hot shower after a long day at work. The unbelievably overwhelming number of options of where to best relieve yourself at any point of the day without looking like a common vagrant who pisses as he pleases and back to eating out of a dumpster. But really, this sort of thing is more hilarious than anything else. Apparently, the French encourage trashy hobo behavior from a young age. It’s no wonder that I find that many of the conversations discussing the teachings of Descartes with crazy train-traveling hobos behind dumpsters are often in French.

Wasn’t there supposed to be a restaurant review in here?

So La Frégate. There’s not too much in the way of vegetarian fare here. Jen opted for the cheese plate, which, with almost every restaurant’s complimentary basket of baguette slices, made do for enough of a lunch for her. It was a better option than the tomates mozzarella, which seems to be the default vegetarian option offered at every french cafe. In fact, sometimes being the only vegetarian option, which would pretty much piss me off if I were veg. Thankfully, Jen’s got miles more patience than me, and kept her chin up her two giant blocks of brie and a small French salad.

Le Stinky Frommage, c est tres délicieux!

I doubled down with the croque monsieur (which I translates to crotchety man), a French twist on the ham and cheese with the ham still being on the inside, but the cheese being melted on top for a hot, delicious mess. A little bit kinky and odd, but still pretty satisfying. Like having a threesome with a little person.

WHAT?

Croque Monsieur

I also had the Rooty Tooty Fresh ‘n’ Fruity omelette stuffed with again, ham and cheese, just to load up protein after a light breakfast. I’m not sure if the waiter was appalled or impressed, but I’m sure I only reinforced the idea that all Americans pig out at every opportunity of a meal. In retrospect, both of my dishes were very similar, and both were very tasty, but I’d go with the omelette and another dish if I were to eat at La Fregate again.

The cafe doesn’t particularly stand out in food quality, but it’s not bad, either. Service is attentive and friendly, and you can have fun watching both the cars and people go by. The menu offering isn’t particularly well suited to vegetarians or vegans, but if you find yourself starving after a long exploration throug the Orsay Museum or the Louvre, you can definitely get a decent meal for a decent price at La Frégate. View a map of La Frégate here.

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